While looking for a topic to write about today, a feeling of remorse started to grow in me. Am I boycotting my own creativity?
Every single time I am motivated to achieve a certain goal, I end up setting rules that depend on my creativity to be there, leading to me feeling guilty if there’s nothing to write about that day.
Is it because I am too hard on myself? Absolutely.
I find that affirmation to be bland. It doesn’t calm down my eagerness to put things out there for you to consume. It won’t deal with my sense of responsibility.
Being less critical of myself is not a good way to keep progressing.
I don’t have many friends, but I know a valuable person when I see one. J.B. (And I am not referring to myself with those initials) has been one of the most inspiring people I’ve ever met. He had the most valuable lesson I’ve ever been taught when it comes to working.
“Discipline is everything. It doesn’t matter if you are motivated or not. Sit down at your desk for 10 minutes and do something.
If your conclusion is that there’s nothing you can do that day by the end of those ten minutes, then take a break. It’s probably a sign that you need it.
If within those 10 minutes you find something that picks your interest, then you’ve got some motivation out of it.”
This rule has never failed me. But it hasn’t because of the twist I gave it to make it work for me.
You see, being an artist in the games industry is hard. You think everyone expects you to put certain pieces of work out there when it’s only you setting limits to your creativity.
A vehicle artist can only do vehicles if he wants to be better, or a character artist can’t do environment work as it won’t teach him anything about his craft.
We tend to be very close-minded towards what growing means to us.
This is what this article is ultimately all about. After 8 years of creating art for games and some short movies, I came to realize that I shouldn’t care too much about what other people think of my work as long as I’m proud of it.
The more limits I put to what I should be making, the more I’m risking running out of things I can make to fulfill my creative thirst.
Writing has nothing to do with making art for games, but still, here I am, writing about my life.
I opened this page today to write about the trickery used in GTA: San Andreas, but found out my internet is crap and the website wasn’t loading, plus the levels didn’t look like they were ripped correctly.
This made me anxious. I had to put something out there. This means I’m falling under the same mistakes as I always have. I’m deciding what I should write about depending on what I think fits in the category of appropriate for me.
I’m assuming what you want to read, and I’m not thinking about what I want to write.
So coming back to the twist for that rule I mentioned above. Sitting down in front of my computer with a plan to develop something specific works sometimes, but not always.
My hunger for creation can be satiated with whatever, like literally anything. I really believe this applies to anyone. We just need to walk away from the limits we and others impose on what we do.
Today, I don’t care about what you want to read or that I have to put something out there. Today I care about exploring, learning, and fulfilling my urge to be creative.
So let’s do something here together. I challenge you to search for new ways to find peace and deliver work that reaches out of your comfort zone.
There’s nothing worse than feeling inspired but not being able to work on something that satisfies your inspiration. Let’s put an end to that.